Ninja Puppies are Coming!

Criminals and ne'er do wells beware! A new crime fighting duo has unleashed their brand of violent, vengeful justice on the underworld.



Beware the Ninja Puppies!












Weight Loss this week - 2 lbs

Total weight loss - 18 lbs

Holy Crap! SNL is Funny Again. At Least for One Night.

So I'm up late last night, not quite ready to go to sleep so I decide to check out SNL and something amazing happened. I watched 4 skits and all four were good. Justin Timberlake was hosting and they had him dressed up in one skit as a giant soup cup and competing with Santa for Christmas change donations; then they had him in a decent gameshow skit followed up by a reprise of the hilarious "Barry Gibb Show" (Talking it up, on the Barry Gibb Talk Show). All were good but not great.

Then they dropped this one on me. I will warn you, it is not safe for work or children but it is an SNL skit so other than that all is safe. I thought at first it was some sort of lame attempt to make fun of Hall and Oats and Color Me Badd. I thought it was kind of stupid and was about to turn it off when..... well just see for yourself: (Oh and be sure to turn off the music player at the bottom of the page)

Two Big Boys

Currently Listening To - Wolfmother: Woman

I'm in a bit of a weird mood this morning. I wanted to post something but couldn't figure out what I wanted to say. So I sifted through some old pictures and came across this one of me and my "little" brother Paul rockin' the Monorail at Disney a couple of years ago. I don't know why but I love this picture. Just me and the boy chillin between parks. So I dug a little deeper and found a couple more fun pics.



Damn, I was a cute kid. I remember that sweater always got compliments from the girls at school. It always paid off being the weird readheaded kid. I think because I was less threatening than the more popular kids. Plus do you see that hair. I mean DAMN! (I told you I was in a weird mood today).

And here's one of the other Wade boy. Holy crap what a dork! Of course if someone else had said that back in the day I would have completly throttled their ass.

Oh and if you are wondering how two guys could wind up so world alteringly cool; well here's your answer:

Yes friends, that is indeed Mr. Dennis "Big Daddy" Wade in all his 70's glory. I mean check out those choppers. This was of course pre-beard so you may have trouble recognizing him but it is him all the same. I can see what my mom was thinking. I mean, dude was a pimp!

OK, I guess that's enough. Sorry I had to put you through all that.

Weight Loss Update

I started a regular, daily exercise schedule this week as opposed to just squeezing it in when I could before. It was a short week for weight loss since I weighed in on Monday (last post) and then again on Friday but I still lost a few pounds and I am still on track to drop 100 pounds in 6 months.

Weight Loss This Week - 3 Lbs

Weight Loss To Date - 16 Lbs

A Little Less Fat, A Lot More Action

Why am I posting a picture of a Turkey a full two weeks after Thanksgiving you ask? Good show old boy, excellent question. Well I chose said turkey to illustrate a recent success. That's right friends, since the start of my journey I have lost the equivalent of a medium sized frozen turkey. A total of 14 pounds in three weeks. I am stoked! I've done it mainly on a radical change in my diet and minimal exercise. I've cut out the junk food, soda and sodium and replaced them with wheat bread sandwiches for lunch, loads of veggies at dinner, 4-5 salads a week and low fat jello for desert. Of course I've had a few indulgences but you could cut off a couple of my fingers and still count them on one hand so I'd say that beats the every day Oreo binges I had been known for.

As for the exercise, I got in a walk whenever I could but with work being hectic and some craziness going on at home I didn't do nearly as much as I wanted. Well no more, starting today I am working out on my lunchbreak at the office. I don't like anyone at work enough to eat lunch with them anyway so this will be a good use of my time. And if you need a reminder of the wonderful, joyous bliss that awaits you at the end of my journey; well here you go:

Weight Loss This Week - 6 Lbs

Weight Loss to Date - 13 Lbs

Today's Listening Pleasure - Aerosmith: Dream On

THE GAME

Today's Mood - Motivated

Today's Music - Say Anything: I Want To Know Your Plans

Today's Plans - Army v Navy

This Weeks Weight Loss - 1 lb

Total Weight Loss - 7 lbs

So today is one of my favorite Saturdays of the year. The annual Army/Navy football game in Philly. I've been watching the game since I was just a little pain in the ass. My dad got me into it. I always thought it was weird that he thought the game was such a big deal since Georgia never played in it; but as I got older I realized it's not about the team it's about all the people behind the teams. These guys are not just football players, they are soon to be officers that will be putting their lives on the line for our country. For me the game is a chance to look at the TV and ooze with pride at the men and women that we turn out from this great country. And with as messed up as things are these days, it's wonderful to know that these guys have our backs.

Now with a great grandaddy that served on a battleship in WWII and a granddaddy that also served in the Navy after WWII I am obviously a Navy man. But again, the game is only slightly about who wins. More importantly its about celebrating our armed forces and the men and women who serve. So I'd like to give a shout out to all those who have put in their time taking care of all of us here at home. Doug and Bish, this especially goes out to you guys, even though you only joined the Air Force. Just kidding. You guys are my heroes.

Now, for the important part.

GO NAVY! BEAT ARMY!

Happy Thanksgiving

Well I hope everyone had a great holiday. Brandy definitely got her fill of turkey and has pretty much been doing this all weekend.

As for me, week one of my weight loss project was a success. I dropped 6 pounds between Friday and Wednesday. We weighed in early this week because of the holiday. Of course I figure about 2 pounds was due to the fact that I weighed in Friday in the afternoon after eating breakfast and lunch whereas on Wednesday I weighed in first thing before eating any food or having any water. But nevertheless I dropped some weight this week.

Of course this new endeavor has affected my holiday. I was very careful with what I ate yesterday, keeping it to one plate of food and one piece of pie. We only brought leftover turkey home so that I am not tempted to gorge myself of leftovers and let me tell you I would love nothing more than to dig into some corn casserole right now! But, I figure I've had 29 years to gorge myself on the holidays, I can handle one year of less than nominal food intake.

Well, thanks for checking in. I'm off to watch more football. Hopefully my Dawgs can take care of those pesky Yellow Jackets tomorrow and salvage something out of what has been a horrible season.

Go You Silver Britches!

Weight Loss This Week - 6 lbs

Weight Loss To Date - 6 lbs

Operation Jumbo Drop

Well today is day one. The goal? To lose a small human over the next 8-12 months. Starting here:

I plan to lose 100-120 pounds by this time next year. If you're reading this then hopefully I consider you friend or family and I ask for your support. I'm taking charge of my health beacuse I'm sick and tired of being fat. I absoulutely love who I am but this fleshy vessel in which I transport the awesomeness that is The Dwight has got to go.

So, please cheer me on. I will be making weekly update posts on this page to chart my progress. I welcome any encouragement or criticism that you feel necessary. With your help I will reach my ultimate goal. Yes that's right, next year, at Halloween, The Dwight will appear at a creepy party near you as the one, the only:


BUCK ROGERS!

Now Laugh Damnit!

Howdy Friends.

Well it's been quite some time since I've written anything meaningful here but things have been a bit hectic for me. I am continually amazed at the way God works in our lives. Things get turned upside down, flipped and turned around only to have God waiting with arms wide open to catch us. Wounds are meant to be healed and the process is unbelievably amazing. Thanks to those of you who have leant your support over these past few weeks, you know who you are and we love you very much.

So this weekend was supposed to be a fun getaway to Holland where the wife and I would do some shopping and have some fun. I had not been over to the uber-Dutch corner of this overly Dutch corner of Michigan since I was knee high to a grasshopper and I had based my expecations for the trip on prior memories of the experience. Well, much to our chagrin, ye old outlet mall has fallen into a bit of disrepair. I assume it has much to do with the availability of quality products at affordable prices at retailers such as Meijers or Wal-Mart but it was quite the shock to see approximately 2/3 of the storefronts empty. Jenny's visions of prancing through the parking lot with bags full of heavily discounted products was dashed quickly by the revelation that The Gap and American Eagle were her only choices. At my salary level you don't fill up many bags when the heavy discounts come off of clothing that was unreaonably marked up beforehand.

Ah well, it was not meant to be and we amused ourselves by going to the Westshore Mall and filling up shopping bags at stores that could have been reached at shopping centers without driving 45 minutes away from home in a car with no A/C. But at least we got to hang out together and eat at the Red Robin so all was not a loss.

I also need to give big props to Rie for putting together a killer treasure hunt. Unfortunately Jen and I were not able to compete but we were able to help out and it was a blast. We can't wait for the next one!

Well, I guess that is the extent of my update. I will try to relay more in the coming days. I start school again in 2 weeks and that always seems to stimulate my writing bug.

So long friends. Have a nice week and do me a favor, go find your better half, let them know you love them, give them a hug and a kiss then walk away leaving them befuddled as to your spontaneous show of affection.

Love ya all.

D

Oh Mother!

Why did the zombie baby cross the road?

To wreak an unholy vengeance upon the driver of the car who's standing there, scratching his head, trying to figure out how a zombie baby's head can be beneath his car tires but the rest of the body is nowhere to be seen-- unless he were to turn around and notice the zombie baby body bearing down on him, coming ever closer, ready with grasping, pudgy zombie baby fingers to tear and rend at the flesh of this self-same driver who ran his head over, on the dark and rain-swept road that snakes down from the castle of the madman who's creating an army of zombie babies to do his dark, libidinal bidding.

The Odyssey Begins

And so it begins. This here is how I look when I think of the clustered, jumble of wonderful my life will be for the next few weeks. Three straight weekends either loaded with activity, travel or both.


Friday we accompanied the Dornan clan to see The Mines at The Black Rose downtown. Let me say, it was one of the best shows I've seen in quite some time. The boys really nailed it. Plus I got to have a few pints o' the old Guinness.


Unfortunately we had to sit through these guys. Their name is Fishlips and yes I think that it means exactly what you are thinking. At one point after their set their base player was dancing with some friends next to our table and took it upon himself to let me know that he had placed his genetalia on his guitar player's head. Yep they were that kind of group.



Thankfully I was there to save the day with the antidote: Black Rose Shots!


What's the fastest way to forget about the juvenile college band that just played? A healthy dose of The Mines of course! And of course the guys delivered.
















The boys were followed by a local group called The Drive.

This guy could freakin pick the ole' six string. Kind of a mix of Tantric and Primus. I found them quite enjoyable.




All in all it was a good night. One forgettable band, one decent band and one awesome band. Hey, have I mentioned that I'm into The Mines yet?


So we followed up Friday's night of music with a day at the races. Turn 4, row 26, close enough to see Junior and Tony when they rode by during the pre race parade.

Unfortunately this is about as high as Tony would get in the standings on the day. He crashed about 30 laps in, spun out right in front of us. Jenny was not pleased. I giggled a little inside.









So that was our weekend. Next up, 4 days of work followed by 28-30 hours of driving crammed into a 76 hour period so we can make my cousin's wedding in Athens, GA this weekend. Then I get three more days of work before I get to Dougie's wedding. I get to make corn casserole for 200. Sweet! But I'm completely psyched to see all the old gang again. So if you are keeping score, that's one concert, a NASCAR race, a driving marathon, a family reunion/wedding, and a Relect reunion/wedding all within 15 days. Bring it on!

WARNING! - More Gratuitous 70's Beefcake

Happiness is a all day Buck Rogers Marathon on Sci-Fi. That's right folks, I spent the last day of my vacation watching crappy the incomparable Gil Gerard weasle his way out one fiasco after another with his peculiar 20th century charm and greasy sex appeal that non 25th century villain could combat. Oh how I miss 80's TV. Don't you agree Twiki?




"BeDe BeDe BeDe. Oh Buck."



Anyway, it was a nice weekend. Jenny and I went to Binder Park Zoo on Saturday. I will never go John Ball Zoo as long as I live. Not when there is an actual, legitimate zoo within driving distance. However, I do wish they would put in some more exzibits to go with all that walking.

Hold on, I need to take care of something.







Um, Buck, Han called, he said no Tools allowed on the Falcon, and if he finds any more of clothes missing from his closet, he will have to sick Chewie on you.












OK, sorry about that. Stupid B-List space pilots.

Back to the weekend, I also saw X-Men 3 this weekend. Awesome from a movie standpoint but i have some major issues from an X-Men standpoint. I mean they killed off _______ and _______ within the first hour and ________ also bought it at the end. Then _______ and __________ lose their powers! I mean I'm all for keeping the audience guessing with surprise deaths and stuff but 5 main characters either got iced or lost their powers. Now I know that it sort of teased an answer to the dilema but for come on. I mean bad ass _________ chose to give up her powers? I don't freaking think so. Of course I'm glad that girly man _________ got his. Never liked him. (Names have been removed to protect the dumbasses who haven't seen the movie yet).

Well, thats about it. We saw a Whitecaps game last night and I saw Matt Hughes kick the crap out of Hoyce Gracie on Saturday night in the UFC but that wasnt surprising. Of course I had to go back to work today and it's like I never left. Aaaarrgggghhhh!



OK, I warned you, If you've read this far, you deserve what is about to happen next.



Ladies and Gentlemen.








Buck Rogers and man chest.

If Only I Were Pissed When I Took This Test

You're 80% Irish

Congratulations, you're a shining example of an Irish lass (or lad). There's hardly anyone more Irish than you!

How Irish Are You?

Tales of Beer and Champagne

Well here it is, my first baby. That's right, my very own Irish Red Ale home brew. Oh, so tasty! A little bit nutty, moderate hop flavor with just a touch of honey. I can't wait for the next batch!



On Saturday my beautiful bride and I traveled to Montague, MI and spent the night at The Weathervane Inn. It was a wonderful night of relaxation, champagne and overpriced food and what passes for a fancy restaurant in Whitehall. Altogether, it was just the break we needed to get away from the stress that acompanies everyday life. And best of all, my fat ass actually fit in the jacuzzi!

Some Pictures, Just for Fun

And here we have Brandy, feverishly preparing for her hard day of sleeping, eating and......um......well I guess that's about it.






Don't worry Daisy. We're not too sure about her either.







What's that Daisy? Did Chris just get here?!?






Ah, a boy and his dog. Too bad it's my damn dog. You are a dead man Dornan!

The Mysterious Joey's Triangle

So apparently there is a rip in the space time continuum somewhere within the dining area of Joey's Seafood and Grill on Kalamazoo Ave. I was to meet The Todd for lunch today and arrived at said restaurant at the appointed time of 11:45 am EST. After mentioning to the host that I was to meet an aquaintance for lunchtime dining I was informed that there were no other single diners present at the time. As such I was led to a table near the front door. I proceeded to sit facing the one and only entrance to this eating establishment and awaited the arrival of The Todd. After about 15 minutes, with no Todd in sight I proceeded to order my food to insure a timely return to my place of employment. After my lunch arrived at the table I proceed to consume the tasty vittles provided me by the fine kitchen staff. Still, no sign of my dining companion. Eventually, resigned to the fact that that my lunch was fully consumed and The Todd was nowhere in sight I paid my bill and returned to the office.

It is here that this story enters the realm of agents Mulder and Scully. Upon my return to the office I contacted The Todd by way of telephone. The Todd was thoroughly concerned as to why I had not been at the agreed upon restaurant. I advised my companion that I had indeed been at the restaurant of choice and had consumed my meal, all the while eyeing the front door awaiting his arrival. The Todd proceeded to describe to me how he had been seated at Joey's at the prescribed hour of 11:45 am EST. He described a booth by the window, on the opposite side of the dining area from my 4 person table by the front entrance. Yes folks, somehow two fully grown, adult males sat approximately 30 feet from each other, consumed their respective meals, each awaiting the arrival of the other, only to leave the restaurant bewildered and concerned for their missing dining partner.

The only logical explanation is that a time travelling member of Q dined at the same establishment prior to our arrival; his mere presence disrupting the flow of time and space between the tables occupied by myself and The Todd. This disruption obviously distorted our perception of reality, hiding each of us from the others field of vision.

Had I not left my tricorder in the car perhaps I could have thwarted this nefarious plot by Q and his compainons and enjoyed the planned lunch with my dear friend.

Alas Q, you have won this round, but I will win the war! Oh, yes good sir, you shall be defeated!

Wow. Just Wow.

If I can make it through life without pissing off Trey Parker and Matt Stone I will be a happy man.

They're just scary.

Happy Saint Patrick's Day

There's nothing quite like a breakfast of sausage, eggs, hashbrowns and a nice, cold Guinness to start your day!




Aye, that's me around 9:00 this morning, on about Guinness # 3.


And here is my lovely bride enjoying her green beer (or colored water, the taste was about the same).








So Happy St. Patrick's Day everybody! If you'll excuse me, I'm off to watch Boondock Saints which will be followed by a nap so I can prepare for round two tonight!


Slainte!

Klingons Make Me Giggle

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Klingon Recipes.

My favorite is the Vegetarian Lasagna. Vegetarians = Scrumptious



Also be sure to check out the equally amazing Klingon Fairy Tales.



"Act, and you may eat dinner. Think, and you may be dinner. " - Klingon Proverb

A Sad Day For Baseball

Sports give us an escape from the drudgery of our everyday lives. Our sports heroes become larger than life. We look past their shortcomings and concentrate on the seemingly superhuman feats they are able to accomplish. After his retirement Kirby Puckett was revealed to be far from an innocent human being. But then again who among us is. I choose to remember the baseball player. He singlehandedly ripped the 1991 World Series out of the grasp of my beloved Braves and I will always have the memory of his leaping catch against the outfield wall in game 6 etched in my mind. I choose to remember the baseball player who could performamazing feats that we as regular joes can only dream about. So here's to you Kirby Puckett, thanks for the memories.

I Have Tasted Heaven And It Was Covered With Barbecue Sauce and Fried Onion Straws

Mad props to Clan Dornan for their recommendation of the phenomenal eatery known as Red Robin.

Best - Hamburger - Ever


Nuff Said

WARNING! Gratuitous use of 70's TV Beefcake

Well, the two week affair with the 54" HDTV is now over. My heart is broken. It is a two week fling I shall remember fondly for the rest of my days.

Yes, I am home now and I am thoroughly enjoying it. Housesitting is fun but I missed my bed, my chair and my computer. Plus, I now have access to my Musicmatch service again. I was going through music withdrawl, a condition I have since remedied with a steady dose of ROCK!



And now, for your viewing pleasure I give you - Ike and The Mullet





So, I'm smack in the middle of my Mosaic literature class. What have I learned you ask? Well, for one, don't ever sacrifice incense to the Lord, lest you be consumed by fire. Not good times. Also, I absolutely love the punishment for sacrificing to a false god; "He must be destroyed". That's a pretty violent end when you consider that death has already been listed for other sins. I would hate to see what God considers utter distruction.


So, has anyone else noticed an influx of good new rock music lately. Maybe I'm just fining more good indie label stuff now that I'm getting my music online. Whatever it is I have filled my playlist with about 50 pretty damn good songs lately. Bands like From First to Last, Refused, Matchbook Romance or Matisyahu. Ike is happy.

Anyway, that's where I'm at today, just enjoying some good new music and hanging out with my lady.

Say goodbye Ponch.



Yeah! Ponch loves YOU!

Birthday Wishes

Today I feel old. This always happens when one of the younguns has a birthday. When you get to know someone as a youth group sponsor, watch that someone grow from a wiry little high school freshman into a kick ass officer in the Air Force, well it makes you feel kinda cool. It also makes you feel really old. I mean if he's 24 then that means I'm getting way toO close to 30.

But enough about me, this post is dedicated to my favorite Air Force 2nd Lieutenant. His name is Doug and since he is one of about only 4 people who actually reads this blog, Happy Birthday buddy! Have a Guinness and pretend that it's from me.


ME LLAMO JUAN!

Wait a Minute Here

What the hell? They are playing Soul Asylum on the classic rock station. No. I will not stand for this. I deserve at least another 5-8 years before my music is old enough to be considered "classic". This is not right!

Someone will pay for this.

Ahhhhhhhhhggggghhhhhh!!!!!!

OK, I just spent the last 20 minutes spilling my soul on this stinking site. Then, when I go to spell check the damn thing, it all erased. Maybe it was only meant for me to do it as a cathartic exercise. I guess I could rewrite it but it would just seem kind of pointless to write the whole thing again.

I love technology.

I'm Hooked on the Steelers

First, for all four of you who actually read this, sorry I'm late with my Superbowl pick but I could't get on to Blogger all weekend.

Second, I'm pretty sure if Kit ever saw this, he would have run Michael Knight over like 12 times.


Anyway, on to the Superbowl.


Pittsburgh (+4) over Seattle

I just cant bring myself to pick against Pittsburgh. I think they are hungry for a wind and Seattle is just enjoying the experience. I have nothing by my gut on this one, but I see Pittsburgh winning what should be a very good game.

Pittsburgh 24 - Seattle 17

If It's Not Scottish, It's Crap!

For my money, Amazing Grace is the most beautiful song ever composed. If you don't get chills when you sing the last verse of that song you have a wire loose. And when it is played by a pipe band, well few things in this life are more uplifting to me. I'm secure enough in my manhood to admit that I easily tear up to the sound of Amazing Grace on the pipes.

Well kids, I've found what I think is absolutely the most gorgeous rendering of the song. It is performed by the U.S. Air Force Reserve Band and I have never heard a better version. Click on the "for Heroes proved" album with the picture of the F-16 and select the "Amazing Grace" track. It is phenomenal.

If you are into pipe bands yu can also check out their site for a bevy of excellent selections.


Enjoy!

You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin

Val Kilmer was recently asked if he had ever played a homosexual in a movie before.

His response?

"Only if you count Top Gun".


Priceless.

The Quest

OK, so I'm .500 for the playoffs so far. Definitely not impressive, but considering it's my first attempt at picking against the spread in the playoffs I'll take it. So, in my quest for a winning playoff record, I give you my conference championship picks.

Last week: 2-2
Playoffs: 4-4


Pittsburgh (+3) defy Denver (h)

I'm 1-1 with games involving Pittsburgh so far. I really think this game could go either way. If you're a Denver fan you have to be at least somewhat concerned at the prospect of Jake the Snake leading your team in such a huge game. But they are playing at home in front of one of the best crowds in football. As for Pittsburgh, I've already mentioned how much I love Hines Ward and I think it would be great for The Bus to get a Superbowl win in his hometown of Detroit. I have no logical reasoning for my pick so I'm going with the gut. The game will be close but I see Ward making his customary huge plays, fast Willy Parker and The Bus grinding out the clock and Jake the Snake throwing a late interception to The Polynesian Warrior in a pivotal 4th quarter.

Pittsburgh 21-Denver 17


Carolina (+3 1/2) def Seattle (h)

This pick is being made solely on the fact that I have yet to pick a Carolina game correctly. I've gone against them at every juncture and they have pretty much dominated everyone they've played the last 5 weeks, all on the road. That and the fact that Seattle is making their first trip this deep in the playoffs and Carolina was in the Superbowl just 2 seasons ago. Steve Smith continues his domination of the playoffs and scores at least 2 touchdowns.

Carolina 31 - Seattle 24

The Day My Earth Stood Still

Five years ago today I became the luckiest man in the world. She said "I do" and my life changed forever. I can remember watching her on the beach that night while she was dancing at the beach party at the resort and realizing that she was by far the most beautiful woman I had ever seen.

It's been five wonderful years and I can't wait to see what the next five have in store. And the five after than, and the five after that and so on.

So here's to the next five years sweet pea. Thanks for saying yes. I love you.

I Love You Too Earl. You'll Be My First

So here we are at week two of the playoff. After a respectable 2-2 record for my first attempt I'm ready for more! Of course I've racked my brain trying to figure this week out and I'm still not very confident. Anyway, based on quotes from "My Name is Earl" here goes.

Last week: 2-2
Playoffs: 2-2


Seattle (h) over Washington (-9 1/2)

"I tried Earl. I did! Towards the end I even pulled out my good boob!."

I have reservations about both teams. Namely Seattle's lack of any playoff sucess and Washington's inability to do anything offensively last week. My heart tells me to go with Gibbs' Redskins on this one but I just don't think they have enough to even keep this one close. Seattle gets it's first playoff win.


New England (+3) over Denver (h)

"Earl, the feel of your hands on my body just feels right."

I just can't bring myself to pick against the Pats until someone beats them in the playoffs. Denver and Indy are both capable of doing it but I'm not about to go against Brady and Belichick with as well as they have things going lately.


Pittsburgh (+ 9 1/2) over Inianappolis (h)

"I don't want to. I really don't. Your'e a good friend of mine. I don't want to burn your testicles."

I'm breaking one of Simmons rules here but I think Indy wins a close one. I think 9 1/2 is too high of a line. Indy is coming off the bye week preceeded by 3 weeks of meaningless football to end the regular season. Indy moves on in their quest for the title but I think it's by a touchdown or less. Should be a very exciting game to watch.

Chicago (h) over Carolina (+3)

"If you snatch enough purses, you learn a thing or two about mace."

Another hard one to pick. Chicago's offense scares the crap out of me but their defense scares the crap out of the other teams. Plus, Carolina is not up to 3 straight good games. They are bound for a stinker sooner or later. I'm going with sooner. Chicago wins, setting up their upset of Seattle in the title game.

Hollywood Hates Dwight

Why does Hollywood hate me and others with this wonderous moniker? I'm sure no one else has noticed since no one I know has my name but anytime a TV show or movie has a character named Dwight they are always either an annoying loser, a deadbeat or a child molester. I first noticed it on "Roseanne" with Dan's deadbeat car mechanic buddy and it has continued through today where you can find the name attached to the annoying ass kissing know-it-all on "The Office." You'd think a name shared by a freaking President would have a little more positive cachet. But no! And to top it off, whenever I tell someone my name over the phone at work do you know what there first question is if they aren't sure what I said? "Oh, like the country singer?"

Yes, I have the same first name as an obscure yet talented country music singer. It gives me great comfort to know that so many people immediately think of Dwight Yoakam when hearing my name and not the man who led the Allies to victory in WWII or served in the highest office of our great country. Well, I guess at least they don't compare my name with that of a washed up, coke addicted ex-baseball player.

Rant over.

I think I peed myself a little

Thanks to Doug for a The Funniest Blonde Joke of All Time


Lauging make me giggle.

Highway to the Danger Zone

Before I get started I just have one thing to say.
Pat Robertson is a moron. I mean come on. How can someone in his position be that off base about God? Mrs. Robertson, The Defense Department regrets to inform you that your son is dead because he was stupid.


Anyway, since the Dawgs and Falcons completely let me down last weekend I will now turn my attention to the NFL playoffs. I will try my hand at picking against the spread. Remember this is a first attempt so don't think this is advice. Here we go.

Ghost Rider you are at two miles, call the ball.

Roger Ball.



Washington (-3) def Tampa Bay (h)

I think Joe Gibbs finally got his team together. Bascially two average teams that play good, solid, hard nosed football. It will come down to the coaches and I'm not about to pick Gruden over the hall of fame Gibbs.

New England (h) def Jacksonville (+7 1/2)

New England has pretty much had their way with oponents lateley (except Miami) and their opponents have been stronger teams. Jacksonville has struggled with weaker opponents. Plus, Tom Brady is so money he could take the pass at the admiral's daughter (Penny Benjamin) and not catch any flack for it.

NY Giants (h) def Carolina (+3)

Carolina had two good weeks in a row to end the season. That's more than they've had all year. I don't see a third week. Tiki runs wild.

Cincinnatti (h) def Pittsburgh (+3)

Easily teams 2 and 3 for me behind Atlanta, due mainly to the amount of ex Bulldogs on the rosters. I think this year David Pollack and Odell Thurman and the Bengals defense shut down Hines Ward and the Pittsburgh offense. It's actually hard to make this pick because Ward is by far my favorite NFL player. An ex Dawg who is hard nosed and as old school as they come. You just know he relishes every minute on the field.

Well, there they are. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to put on my Ray Ban aviator glasses and go listen to some Kenny Loggins.