27 May, 2007
Why I Love My Wife
For some strange reason I bought a can of sardines today. I talked Jenny into trying it with me and she proceeded to reenact Tom Hanks part of the above scene, sneezing, newspaper and everything. She even made me nod my head in reassurance before she would take the pretzel off the plate I mean I'm supposed to be the dork that does stuff like that.
Impressive. Most impressive.
By the way, sardines taste just like salmon. It was quite a tasty snack. Just in case you were dying to know.
25 May, 2007
Hapy Birthday!
30 years ago today, God reached down from the heavens and gave us the second Greatest Story Ever Told:
Most uneducated humans will tell you that George Lucas was the one responsible for this Sci-Fi masterpiece. But recent evidence (i.e. Episodes I, II, and II) has proven conclusively that Mr. Lucas is just another delusional egomaniac that refuses to see his role as a mere tool in God's great plan to bless the nerds of this world with the greatest villain of all time.
So, on this holiday weekend, take a minute to thank any vets who cross your path, have a spirited discussion with a friend about the ramifications of Luke's creepy, incestuous kiss with Leia and throw down a couple of Colt 45's for Lando.
May the Force be with you. Always.
Most uneducated humans will tell you that George Lucas was the one responsible for this Sci-Fi masterpiece. But recent evidence (i.e. Episodes I, II, and II) has proven conclusively that Mr. Lucas is just another delusional egomaniac that refuses to see his role as a mere tool in God's great plan to bless the nerds of this world with the greatest villain of all time.
So, on this holiday weekend, take a minute to thank any vets who cross your path, have a spirited discussion with a friend about the ramifications of Luke's creepy, incestuous kiss with Leia and throw down a couple of Colt 45's for Lando.
May the Force be with you. Always.
13 May, 2007
Someone Call Child Protective Services!!!!
Their parents should be thrown in jail for allowing this to happen.
12 May, 2007
We're Moving!!!!!
Yes folks, it's true. As of June 1, 2007 Kung Fu Christmas will no longer be headquarted in Kentwood, MI. We will be moving further into the bowels of the great city of Grand Rapids. We thought we would share a few pics of our first house with our friends. If you want to see more click on the Flickr banner to the right.
These gorgeous hardwood floors run through the entire upper floor.
The lady who lived here was bit of a pack rat. Jenny's aunt inherited the house when she passed away so there is a bit of cleanout to do.
This my friends is an incenerator. Yes, Dwight will have access to an incinerator. Let the carnage/good times begin!
These gorgeous hardwood floors run through the entire upper floor.
The lady who lived here was bit of a pack rat. Jenny's aunt inherited the house when she passed away so there is a bit of cleanout to do.
This my friends is an incenerator. Yes, Dwight will have access to an incinerator. Let the carnage/good times begin!
08 May, 2007
Spider Man Can Kiss My Ass (Sorry Chris)
OK, here's a litte pet peeve of mine. It was brought to the forefront this weekend with all of the reports of Spider Man 3 "shattering" box office records with the money it took in. Every summer we get a report of another "record setting"
box office draw but there is no mention of ticket sales or prices adjusted for inflation. I mean, Pa Ingalls could buy a horse for $1, does that mean horses are more expensive today? No, of course not. Yes, Spider Man 3 made a bazillion dollars last weekend, but you can't compare the $8.50 I paid for my ticket to the miniscule prices people paid in the past. So I decided to do some checking. Do you know where the original Spider Man ranks among movie earnings adjusted for inflation? 27th, that's where. Spider Man 2? 35th. What about Titanic? Supposedly the highest grossing movie of all time? Only 4th. In fact, of the top 25, only 3 have come out since 1990. Just for fun's sake here is the list of the top 5. Pay close attention to #2.
List of highest-grossing films (adjustedfor inflation)
1Gone With the Wind (1939) $4,399,710,937.01
4Titanic (1997)$2,292,444,182.33
5The Ten Commandments (1956)$1,452,133,080
box office draw but there is no mention of ticket sales or prices adjusted for inflation. I mean, Pa Ingalls could buy a horse for $1, does that mean horses are more expensive today? No, of course not. Yes, Spider Man 3 made a bazillion dollars last weekend, but you can't compare the $8.50 I paid for my ticket to the miniscule prices people paid in the past. So I decided to do some checking. Do you know where the original Spider Man ranks among movie earnings adjusted for inflation? 27th, that's where. Spider Man 2? 35th. What about Titanic? Supposedly the highest grossing movie of all time? Only 4th. In fact, of the top 25, only 3 have come out since 1990. Just for fun's sake here is the list of the top 5. Pay close attention to #2. 
List of highest-grossing films (adjustedfor inflation)
1Gone With the Wind (1939) $4,399,710,937.01
2Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope (1977) $2,652,849,500.35
3Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937) $2,425,862,786.99
4Titanic (1997)$2,292,444,182.33
5The Ten Commandments (1956)$1,452,133,080
And here's some Jimmy Fallon / Star Wars just for fun
06 May, 2007
Guilty Pleasure Alert
I have a confession to make. A deep, dark secret that shames me to my core.
Are you ready?
OK, here we go.
I've been listening to Petra.
I know, it's devastating. I can't believe it happened. I mean I didn't mean to but they had a song on a compilation album I picked up cheap. You know the kind, a bunch of Christian Rock bands played at some festival somewhere and they made a promo CD with singles from each of the bands that played. I bought it for the Kutless and Thousand Foot Krutch songs a few years ago. Then, last week I let the whole thing play through and when I got to the last song I heard this really cool guitar lick, and I'm just a sucker for a catchy guitar lick. Then it happened. Those cheesy 80's lyrics with the crappy rhyme scheme and the faux Robert Plant voice. I was hooked. It was just too damn fun. I couldn't turn it off. Then, before I could stop it, my hand reached down to push the rewind button and it started all over again. I knew it was wrong, but DAMN it was oh so fun. I mean, it's Petra man. PETRA! I felt like i was 10 again. Of course if I was 10 I probably could have written better lyrics but I'm not here to judge. I'm here to sing the guilty pleasure praises of that bastion of "Christian Rock". I mean come on, they had a keytar and everyone knows that's just awesome.
OK, now I feel better. My secret is out. If you never talk to me again I'll understand. But at least I'll have cheesy 80's God Rock to keep me company.
Are you ready?
OK, here we go.
I've been listening to Petra.
I know, it's devastating. I can't believe it happened. I mean I didn't mean to but they had a song on a compilation album I picked up cheap. You know the kind, a bunch of Christian Rock bands played at some festival somewhere and they made a promo CD with singles from each of the bands that played. I bought it for the Kutless and Thousand Foot Krutch songs a few years ago. Then, last week I let the whole thing play through and when I got to the last song I heard this really cool guitar lick, and I'm just a sucker for a catchy guitar lick. Then it happened. Those cheesy 80's lyrics with the crappy rhyme scheme and the faux Robert Plant voice. I was hooked. It was just too damn fun. I couldn't turn it off. Then, before I could stop it, my hand reached down to push the rewind button and it started all over again. I knew it was wrong, but DAMN it was oh so fun. I mean, it's Petra man. PETRA! I felt like i was 10 again. Of course if I was 10 I probably could have written better lyrics but I'm not here to judge. I'm here to sing the guilty pleasure praises of that bastion of "Christian Rock". I mean come on, they had a keytar and everyone knows that's just awesome.
OK, now I feel better. My secret is out. If you never talk to me again I'll understand. But at least I'll have cheesy 80's God Rock to keep me company.
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